On Inclusion

Recently, an article called Am I invisible? One mom's pain-relieving response to being excluded resonated deeply with me.

In it, a young mother describes trying to get to know other parents at her daughter's new extra-curricular activity and feeling left out.

To be excluded, whether out of simple oversight or malice, is an awful feeling, one that unfortunately doesn't get left behind on the playground and in our childhoods.

After two years of enduring bouts of isolation, perhaps we could all use a refresher on making new people in our social circles feel welcome. Here are some ways to be sure that everyone feels included:

Introduce yourself. Introductions are powerful moments that are sometimes overlooked. Keep it simple: "I don't think we've met before. I'm Tracy. It's so nice to meet you."

Invite. If you see someone standing alone at a gathering, invite them to join your conversation. "Join us! We were just talking about the most recent season of “The Great British Bake-Off.” Have you seen it?" 

Ask questions. Saying something as simple as, "Tell me about yourself," is a beautiful way to let others know you're interested in learning more about them. 

Share. Similarly, making sure the interaction isn't one-sided and sharing a bit about yourself and your interests can also help others feel wanted and welcome.

Listen. When getting to know a new friend, being present and actively listening as you get to know one another allows others to feel truly seen and heard.

The author of the article that spoke to me, Rachel Macy Stafford, closes her piece by writing, "What we can do individually to heal the world's collective pain is quite miraculous. We can half the pain by being one person's person."

May we all move forward with as much compassion and welcoming as we can muster.